A love like no other

We see it in movies and TV shows every day. People falling head over heels in love and finding their life partner. We are often taught about the love story of two individuals coming together to find their unity. But what about the longest, and one of the most meaningful love stories - the one with ourselves. What about the journey of self-love to find one’s identify?

I remember it clearly. The teasing when I was a youngster in primary school. “Four-eyes”, they would laugh and say because I was one of the few children who wore glasses at the early age of five. They would say something like “you have a ‘buck’ forehead”, because of how my large forehead was (which they weren’t lying but I have since grown to appreciate that part of me). These moments and other life experiences broke parts of my self-esteem. On top of that, I would be way too self-critical. I realized that this caused more damage than the teasing itself because I allowed my own self to break me. The truth is, it had little to do with how I actually looked or how others saw me, and more to do with how I viewed and valued myself.

It wasn’t until my early twenties when I actively began to pursue self-actualization in figuring out who I was meant to become that I started to learn, value, and love myself in a deeper way. As matter of fact, if we follow the theory laid out by Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, esteem must be achieved before one can satisfy the need of self-actualization.

It took me some time to start getting over the past and re-building myself, but through introspection, prayer, and affirmation, the process of healing is in effect.  Don’t let someone’s impaired vision of you affect the love you have for yourself. Don’t let your own self-imposed doubts get in your way.

I will probably have “four eyes” for the rest of my life, but they at least help me to see. In addition to that, I am reminded that some of the most beautiful and talented women ever also have a prominent forehead. Side Note: Whenever I am unsure if a certain hairstyle would fit my forehead, I normally Google if Rihanna wore a similar hairstyle and if it suited her. If it looked good on her, then it was a go! The thing is, I have never seen one hairstyle that didn’t looked good on Rihanna.

The journey to self-love is sometimes never easy and may never be fully complete. It’s an ongoing and lifetime love like no other. Sometimes, I still feel insecure about certain things, some days I am way too hard on myself.  It takes constant work and honest reflection to get to this place of understanding my self-worth; however, I am happy that I am not where I used to be. I have found solace in loving me the way I am and discovering my purpose.